Does this make me a Montanan?

I think I have  adjusted to life in Hamilton. Here are a few examples why I have come to this conclusion.

• When someone was discussing the amazing “spread of the bull” I didn’t have to secretly wonder what that meant.

• I have driven safely through the 6 unmarked four way intersections safely. Even though there are no stop or yields signs anywhere to be seen.

• I have heated my house with a cord of wood this winter. Just for you non-roughing it people, I have included a definition : “A cord is a unit of measure of dry volume used in Canada and the United States to measure firewood and pulpwood.” Every morning I wake up, build my fire, and consider myself quite the pioneer.

• I have started calling Stevensville “Stevi” this pretty much makes me a local.

• Through great peer pressure from my boys they are going to take “hunters safety."  I will become a huge fan of hunting if they shoot the turkey that still mocks me.

I am sure my list could continue, but I think you get the general idea. Maybe it’s time for me to buy a goat and start wearing Camo.

Some people buy cars

1. Nathan turned 14 this week.  I know he is 6 '1 and looks like he is 19 but it still hurts.
2. I turned 36.  OUCH!  Of course this brings me one year closer to my 40th which is a good thing.   Why you ask?  Well, I decided at my fortieth I am buying two items to celebrate.  First, will be a commercial Slurpy machine that will always be running in my kitchen.  Second, will be the cool candy coin machines that have runts and gumballs in them.  These will change  my life.

I know some people buy cars or go on trips during a mid-life crisis. I obviously resort to my childhood.  I was even asked last week if I would play my violin and speak in Relief Society.  I was so excited until she said.  "Please explain what inspired you to start a new musical instrument  AT YOUR AGE!" 

So to celebrate turning 36 I am starting the violin, looking into Slurpy machines, Oh, and I was fitted for braces last week.  Happy 16th oh I mean 36th to me.

Nothing died well except for the large bird-like turkey

At a church meeting last night they said that blogging totally counts as writing in a journal. Since I don’t ever write in a journal it inspired me to blog more. You will all have to forgive my total lack of grammar.  I have to admit I got so I disliked blogging because it pointed out that I was not great at Kimbals advanced english class.


It has been dang cold here. I know it is cold everywhere but Montana unlike the rest of the world does not salt their roads. This has made my last few weeks difficult.

Things I have almost hit with my car:

A rabbit

Many poor squirrels,

A mailbox

Things I actually did hit with my car:

My bush outside my house,

A very large bird-like turkey thing (Don’t worry this was not my fault, and it is dead now)

A car full of teenagers. (Don’t worry this was also not my fault everyone is alive and well) My favorite part of the whole thing was that it happened on my birthday woo hoo at least the police officer noticed on my license and wished me happy birthday. My second favorite thing was on Sunday when one of the young women said the bummer part of her week was that some of the cheerleaders couldn’t cheer due to being treated for concussions. This was all because some dang lady hit them with her car. Well, at least I didn’t hit the rabbit.

All I want for Christmas.

Me:  Okay, everyone tell me the one thing you really want for Christmas.

Nate:  Minecraft (a video game)

Ben:  Halo and an Xbox to go with it.

Jonny:  Uhhhh, one of those big tubs of potato Salad from Costco.

(Jonny doing Tebow)

Merry Christmas!

30 minutes of Joy

The entire country should model their elementary music programs after ours.  It is truly brilliant. 

6:20 p.m.  All 2nd grade parents shuffle in to gym and quickly find a seat.

6:30 p.m.  All second grade students sing 5 songs most of which the ACLU  would throw a fit over.  (They ended with Silent Night complete with sign language.)

Jonny had a speaking part.  They asked a handful of second graders "How do you celebrate Christmas"

Girl # 1:    "We celebrate because it is Jesus' birthday"  crowd goes  "Ahhhhh"

Boy #2  "We celebrate by giving gifts"  crowd goes "AHHHHH"

Girl #3:  "We decorate a tree"  crowd goes "AHHHHHH"

Jonny:  "We build snow forts"  crowd laughes.

6:50  We quickly shuffle through one door as all the parents of 3rd grade shuffle in through the other.  Merry Christmas to us, we should all go make a snow fort.

Alton, your my hero.

There are some people who never let you down--  my gas station friends who can order a case of nacho cheese and it arrives the next day, Ryan Reynolds for obvious reasons and Alton.  You cannot however count on the tooth fairy. She has stiffed Jonny 3 days in a row.

 We have been seeing this dish pop up for years on our trusty "Food Network."  Since there are no "Chicken and Waffle restaurants here in Hamilton.... I know... shocker we decided to follow Alton's recipe and try it.   It was delightful in a very weird and bizarre way.  So here is a huge shout out to our friend Alton. I think I am going to try to make his home-made candy corns this week because let's face it, all candy corn is gross.

Death of the Hamster

We didn’t have the best of luck with pets as a child. Jenny had a horrible little crab that used to escape and we would find it in weird places. My first hamster’s sad little life ended quite tragically. I had spent many hours crocheting a leash. (Don’t judge me, all children in Wyoming crocheted their pets leashes.) Anyway, I then proudly harnessed my hamster and took her on a walk down to the Lancaster’s. Yet we never made it to the destination because a very scary dog showed up, barked once and my little hamster died instantly from heart failure.


We (Jenny, Jared, Jason, and I) were then entrusted with a second hamster. Oh, the hours I spent dressing up the hamster in all my doll clothes. He was a very happy companion at a time when my older siblings made up horror stories to scare me into staying at home rather than accompanying them to the park. To this day I am still afraid of all dogs, Nazi’s and anyone over the age of 75. Sadly one day our beloved pet also left us. Not by death, but by escaping into the wild to live with all the other happy hamsters.

Last week my parents visited us  in Montana bringing with them my favorite bag of doll clothing for Sarah to play with. It was quite the shock when Sarah’s friend came up to me holding the sad remains of our beloved hamster. Yes, it appears I might have left the poor dressed up hamster in my bag where he must have died slowly and then decomposed over the next 30 years. Well at least it wasn’t the crab.

Where's the s'mores?

Reasons why I need a vacation
1.  Any time you leave your house you return smelling like a campfire.  This is not a bad thing if you are camping and get to experience the happiness of Reesus Peanut butter cup s'mores.  Not as much fun when you are going to the library.

2.  Every time we leave the house Jonny expects to see zombies or some other kind of monster.  It does look somewhat like a horror movie outside.

3.  Nathan chooses to point out what the signs of a red moon mean.  Thank you to all past teachers for this.

Many of our ward members are being evacuated, they're wearing masks outside the lab for bad air quality, but the biggest sign to how dangerous a situation we are in is. (drum roll)  Oh yes my friends, they have cancelled Football practice.   



Please send prayers this way, especially for all my friends who's homes are in danger this week.

False Pride

Ok, Scrabble is not my strong point. Sadly the only people I can beat without cheating are Kettie and my children.  It’s alright; I have mad skills at many other games. So, I am not sure why today’s conversation with Ben was slightly disturbing.


Ben: “Hey Mom, how do you know “so and so”?

Me: I used to know her in an old ward. Why?

Ben: “I have been playing her Scrabble on my ipod”

Me: “What?”

Ben: “You said I could use your Facebook account to play scrabble with Grandma.”

Me “Seriously, how many of my random old friends from high school now believe I have a 5th grade vocabulary?”

Ben: “Uhhhhh, well right  now it's just Dodi?”

It appears for the last couple YEARS Ben has been playing scrabble under my facebook account. In looking it up it appears he averages losing by around 200 points per game. So if you are one of the many secretly gloating over killing me you should  know you suffer from false pride. I am sure I would win if I played you. Of course I might have to cheat.